#19 of the 101 Ways to Love Your Job

Getting a New Groove

No matter how high your enthusiasm may be after taking a training class or reading a new book, there will be no change unless you focus on this material for at least 21 days. That is the purpose of the "action plan" that you see at the end of many workshops.

You will be fighting your "old groove" for the first three weeks, so expect setbacks. Instead of seeing these setbacks as failure to change, realize this is part of the organic process. You are in charge of making changes in your life (both positive and negative). Luck and fate may play a small role, but this research indicates that for the most part, we are in charge of our "programming" and can decide to seek out improvement or to let things stay as they are.

Pretty exciting stuff, but the real question is: What do you plan to think about for the next 21 days?

I'd recommend you be very precise in your thoughts. If you find yourself thinking of something you don't like or don't want or believe, immediately "erase" this programming by repeating mentally the thoughts you do want to predominate. An example:

"I am so scattered. Why do I always wait until the last minute to get things done?"

Instead of perpetuating this self-image, this person may wish to reframe this observation or trait by thinking something else:

"I like the pressure of getting things done at the last minute. I am also working on getting more organized and doing things before they are due."

Even simple thoughts like, "I'm such a geek," can do damage. Instead, visualize "erasing" this groove or thought pattern by saying, "I sometimes act appropriately and sometimes mess up---just like everyone else."

Proactively creating statements to counter your subconscious messages to yourself are also useful. If you know you spend a lot of time thinking negatively about yourself, your work, or certain circumstances, erase these "tapes" and program yourself to see things the way your subconscious/thinking mind wants to frame them.

Our thoughts create our behavior, not the other way around. The more you focus on your thoughts, the more positive results you will see in your interactions with others.

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#17 of the 101 Ways to Love Your Job

Affirmations Work

Affirmations must be stated as if they are already true.

It is common error to state something like, "I will be promoted soon," or, "I want to be financially comfortable." Unfortunately, what this language creates is the state of wanting to be promoted, but not actually being promoted. So instead, you will always want vs. actually attaining your goal.

State the affirmation as if it is already true. In the above examples, an effective affirmation would be: "I am doing things to get promoted every day," or, "I am making choices that lead to financial comfort." A good test of an affirmation is whether if feels like a lie. If it does, then you are doing it right. I know this sounds strange, but if you don't smoke and you decide to create an affirmation like, "I am smoke-free," then where's the work? Where's the change? By definition, you aren't there yet, so it should be untrue (for now).

Affirmations take about 28 days before you start seeing results.

This is also the time it takes to change a habit. There is something in the subconscious that just holds on to our old way of doing things. Many experts feels this 21-28 day cycle is a survival tool held over from our ancestors. The subconscious is trying to do us a favor by creating autopilot responses to free our minds for higher thinking. Instead of having to think about how to brush your teeth each and every time, you probably spend that time reflecting on the day ahead. This is one example of a habit you have established.

Whatever the reason for this delay, be aware that you will feel resistance for about one month. Resistance will look like:

*feeling silly
*being skeptical
*forgetting these suggestions and going back to your old ways

"Just do it" is my best advice for getting past this stage. Caution: watch out for the trap of, "I am becoming more skilled everyday...but not really!" or "I am being financially responsible--despite my inability to stay away from the mall," and other self-sabotaging thoughts.

The next time you find yourself thinking negatively or in a way that doesn't serve your goals or desires, immediately "erase" that programming with an affirmation. Remember---it doesn't matter is your conscious mind thinks it is nonsense. Your subconscious mind accepts and and all input.

Control your thoughts and control your life.

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#16 of the 101 Ways to Love Your Job

Affirmations vs. Positive Thinking

"Willpower creates nothing durable." ~Napoleon

In a nutshell, here's how affirmations work:

1. Your subconscious mind accepts all data without question. Images, words, feelings all register with the subconscious.

What this means is that if you are saying things to yourself like, "Attaboy!" then you're in good shape. If you find yourself saying things like, "You stupid jerk," then you're in for a tough ride. To test this, imagine standing on a hotel balcony--fifty stories up--and then (in your mind's eye) look down at the pool. Feel the zing in your toes? Thoughts have power!

2. Whether you currently believe what you are saying to yourself, the subconscious mind will process it as truth.

If you are trying to lose weight, simply state: "I am losing weight," or some other positive phrase. The subconscious mind deals primarily in imagery, though, so watch out for negative statements like, "I don't want to be fat." To verify this for yourself, say this phrase: "I will not eat that chocolate cake." What's the first thing that popped into your head? Yep. Chocolate cake. So if you are saying, "I don't want to be fat," the image that pops into your head is likely a fat version of you. That is the picture or image that registers with the subconscious mind, and you'll continue to perpetuate this outcome.

3. Affirmations are not the same thing as positive thinking.

Though there are some similarities, the technique for using affirmations is not the same as for positive thinking. Positive thinking asks that you see the positive in every situation, as much as possible. While this allows for the person to focus on the upside of a situation, it may be unrealistic for every scenario (like that stranger following you in the parking lot at 4 am). Instead, affirmations seek to create the outcome you would like, despite the current reality. For instance, if you find you have a chronic illness, or a troubled relationship with your boss, here are some examples of the difference between positive thinking and affirmations:

Positive Thinking (illness): This illness is allowing me to spend the time I needed all along to get myself back on track health-wise.
Affirmation (illness): I am getting healthier every day. I do things that bring me health.
Positive Thinking (relationship): This situation at work is at least teaching me that I can still be productive when someone doesn't like me.
Affirmation (relationship): I am doing things to improve the relationship with my boss. I am taking my share of responsibility for this situation and am making progress every time we meet.

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#14 of the 101 Ways to Love Your Job

No Random Thoughts

Buddha said, "The mind is everything. What we think, we become." This is true in all areas of our lives, but certainly where our careers are concerned. What we are thinking regularly is given attention or mental energy. Mental energy (our thoughts) is manifested in the physical realm as action. Regular actions become habits, and habits create our lives. The more focused and clear our thinking, the more focused and clear the outcome. If the desired end result is not clearly defined and specific, then it is likely we will not realize success. At best, we will get a mixed result---sometimes our plans work out, sometimes not.

Spend time this week thinking about what is happening in your career today. If you are getting inconsistent results at work--sometimes you get recognition, sometimes not; sometimes you get the promotion, sometimes not---then it's likely your thoughts are also inconsistent. When you notice you are thinking in a way that is contrary to your desires, "erase" that thought with one that more accurately represents your goal.

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#4 of the "101 Ways to Love Your Job"

The Power of Habits in Action

If 90 percent of my activity will always be habit, as The Power of Focus says, then what habits do I want/need to set in place to achieve the results I want? This thinking makes a huge difference in getting results. Here are some things I have noticed that changed my thinking once I incorporated this reality:

- When I have setbacks, I don't tell myself what an undisciplined person I am or give up altogether in an attempt to seek perfection. I realize that my old habit is just still more ingrained than my new one. This will simply take more repetition of the new habit until the old is "erased."

- Once I get passed the typical three-to-four week period that establishes a habit, I will find the new habit harder to break. My "mental tug" will not be to the old behavior, but the new one.

- I created the old habit, and I can reprogram myself to follow the new one instead. For instance, has anyone just loved wine at the first taste? How about cigarettes? These "habits" took effort to become a way of life. Let's face it: these things taste awful and probably had nauseating effects at first. And yet, those who have these habits pushed passed the negative side effects in the beginning to establish a love and even a need for the behavior! Why can't anyone do the same for, say, a workout?

So my suggestion to you is to start taking an account of your current habits (not your current failures or lack of progress). Then insert the new habits needed to change your results. The bad habits you have in place feel "normal" because you have done them over and over. Changing your behavior for at least three to four weeks will feel very odd, but so did the current habits during the first few weeks.

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