Thursday, November 27, 2014

Anger: What Is It Good For?



Answer: Absolutely nothing.

Maybe. I'm obviously paraphrasing Bruce here...but let me fill you in on my reasoning.

In my work, I've followed the research on anger most of all. Anger is the thing everyone signs up for my classes to avoid or remedy. It's the main theme for ALL of the interpersonal skill programs. How to avoid this result. The damage it does.

At first, the literature said: Let it all hang out; don't hold back. It's bad for you, it's not healthy. So, we all did. And that got a result...one most of us did not appreciate. One that did damage, esp. in the workplace. Lately, the research says the opposite: To indulge your anger, creates adrenaline neuropathways, that BEG to be fed, once laid down. And then we create situations to allow ourselves to anger/rage. It feels good at the time. And we all know how it feels afterward: mostly shaming, regretful, left cleaning up the consequences.

I've been thinking about this for some time now. I've noticed my relationships have only suffered, never repaired to their former state, much more damage done than benefit found.

I'm not sure what I want any of you to do with this. I'm just noticing the evolution in myself. I'm gonna continue to notice and will report anything I find that works for me...as always.

I can recommend just about EVERYTHING that Albert Ellis wrote. He wrote a lot..so that should keep you busy. He's got several books on anger and how to unplug from it.

See Stephanie's site Work Stress Solutions for more information like this.